Today is monday, the day before FINALS week starts. How shitty this week will be. I guess I should start with the weekend...so friday night uhhh I have no clue what I did..saturday morning I went to work out at curves with Eileen and Lauren..and Eileen and I had a very interesting run-in with the seattle thunderbirds hockey team. Lex and Michaela and I went to the library and studied for a couple hours..went to subway, I got 10 aderal from this guy and lex got 5. We came to my house and then lex called daniel and he said that he was at the library so lexi made us go back..that was boring as all hell. Michaelas mom came and picked us up and dropped lex and I off at lexis. Lexis mom did a regression on me. all I have to say about that is
Im the only gay eskimo
Im the only one I know
Im the only gay eskimo in my tribe
Sunday I did homewrok

Its almost been a week since I last wrote in here. Man I am so busy lately. ITS INSANE! Hm..So Monday I got up and went to school like normal and went to Eileens house after school to work on my photo journal. Tuesday I slept in until 8 somehow, and so I ended up missing first period, my mom drove me to school right before 2nd started. That was a terrible day all around. I got up at 8, and I was really hot, so I put on this tight red 3/4 sleeve v-neck shirt and a black adidas warm up zip up thing instead of my usual sweatshirt and coat. I put my hair in a pony tail and brushed my teeth, then ran out the door to the car. I was in a PMSy mood so that didn't help, and also I had forgotten my Spanish homework. The good thing about that day was that Sammy came up to me after school and was like "Hillary you owe me a hug!" and I asked why..And she said "because you are so beautiful" it was really nice of her considering I pretty much looked like shit that day haha. I went home after school and then to Eileens to take pics of Lauren. It was Jason's birthday and I had promised him that I would go to his house for pineapple and pepperoni pizza, but the schedule got fucked up..So I had to cancel with him. :( Wednesday I don't remember at all. I probably went to Eileens or something..And I went to work out, but that's a given for all days. Yesterday was cool. I woke up at 7 30. fuck me. My bus comes at 7 11...So my mom had to drive me again..haha..But I wasn't late. I had a test in biology and I had forgotten all my shit to turn in, but Mr Crowder is awesome so he only took off 10 points out of 50 even though I only had 2 things out of like 14 things due. That was greatness. After school, I went to Eileens and we worked like crazy ass people on our photo journals..And I danced around her garage because I love blink 182. It was fun. I got a lot of pages done in my book, and then we got dropped off at my house around 5 45. We debated about pointless things with my sister..Like how she swears she will crash into any car I get just because she thinks she should have a better car than me. Crazy woman she is. We left to go work out, and we did....But we were all so exhausted that we only did the recommended 2+2 machine thing instead of 3 rounds..Oh well. Eileen and I went to Subway and had a six inch sub each for dinner. that was grand. We came back to my house..And hung out working on our books for a while. Then Eileen went home and I worked on my book some more...Brent called...I ignored it....Jason called, we talked for a couple hours...Or a few...Anyways, I finished my photo journal and went to bed at like 1. I got up this morning, and did some more work on my book, then left my house at 7 06...My bus comes at 7 11..That was a close call...But I made it to the stop before the bus. In third period, Mr Crowder read my underwear out loud..That was odd...He walked behind me..(the seam of my undies says 'HOT STUFF' on it..) and said "so you're hott stuff?" that was weird and really funny. Kurtis set the curve of our test at 68, and I got 62 :( that fucker...I turned in my photo book in 4th period. Victor dedicated his book to me! It was so awesome, he wrote on his dedication page that he dedicated it "to my band, and to Hillary because she was always there to load my film for me" I was happy because of that. Lunch...Was lunch. But I got so pissed because I went and bought my salad...And I was sitting there eating it all contempt..And then up walked Eileen and Chantel, IT WAS TACO SALAD DAY. fucking piece of shit chef salad...I was so mad! Ah well. I was sooo tired all day from the lack of sleep I've been getting and all this stress from finals and PHOTOGRAPHY. I fell asleep in the computer lab in 6th period, and then came home and slept. I cleaned up my pig sti room and did a bunch of chores, and then my mom took me to Eileens. We cleaned up everything from our photo shit. I used Evans bench machine thing...where you lift a dumbbell (barbell?) it was 65 pounds or something..yay I did 7 ups and downs! that was the first time I ever used one of those work out benches! Andrew called me about the movie we were supposed to go see. Shit didn't work out cuz his mom refused to drive him anywhere. We had dinner and stuff and Eileen gave me a purity test...Turns out, that even though I have done SO MANY faulty things, I am still 48 percent pure! that was amazing, we thought that the computer was going to tell me to go kill myself or something because IM a naughty naughty NAUGHTY girl haha. We watched this stupid-stupid-stupid-stupid independent film about a clown murdering some rappers..It was pretty fucking stupid. haha. I cant emphasize enough the level of stupidity in that film. VERY HIGH! Eileen and I did situps and discussed work out things..LOL and then it happened...Brent called me...damnit...and Jason is supposed to call me tonight but I duno if he will...He was at some party in LW. Tomorrow we are going to work out at 11 and then I don't know what Im doing during the day. I think Jason wants to hang out, but anyways, at night Lexi's mom is giving me a regression. Im excited! I've been waiting for it for soooo long! Sunday I have a soccer game at 1:10..Such a gay time for a soccer game...Well....kinda cool...I don't have to get up really early! I have so much homework this weekend it is insane. I have to read a book and make a website about another book Im supposed to be done reading that Im not, I have to do chapter questions about the book that Im not done reading, I have to write a cause and effect essay on the Neolithic and Paleolithic social classes, I have a review math packet to do, and I have SEVEN Spanish assignments to do. Piece of shit weekend let me tell you! I better get going and get some sleep though..Next week is finals week so I might not write in here until next weekend....When all the stress is gone!
Sexy Mamajama, Beautiful Angel, Hilly (hehe), Lily
*HILLARY!*

Yesterday, my moms boyfriend gave me back my cell phone as I was walking out the door to go swimming with Rhys and Eileen. It was awesome..so now I have it back :D. We went to the gym, and went into the steam room and swam half a mile (that was hard shit...) and then into the hot tub, and then into the sauna and then in to the showers. lol When I was in the shower, Eileen opened my curtain and..wow that was ...awesome...then her and rhys double teamed me haha and did it again. When I got out of the shower, Brent had called me.....ugh. He left a freakyish message and so I called him back and we made plans to meet. Eileen and Rhys came to my house and we threw on some clothes, making a point of lookin bad. (so he would stop calling me) and we left to go meet him at McDonalds. we walked in...and there were these little asian boys and we were like ohhh no that better not be him. It wasnt thank god. Then he showed up...hmm....dark hair, light eyes..and really good teeth. ...hmm...anyways I dont want to talk about him because he really kind of scares me..we went to get a balloon boquet for Lauren..Rhys' dad picked us up from my house and then we went to Eileens( Rhys went home) At 6 30 Eileen and I left for Laurens house, and then Lauren, Amber, Eileen, Cait and I went to Funtasia! WE HAD SO MUCH FUN! I love those girls so much. Cait and I went and played a few games, and won tickets :) and then we had our one peice of pizza each. I had pepperoni and Pineapple with an orange soda YUMMY thats the BEST dinner. Then we had a scoop of ice cream..I got blueberry cheesecake or something, but then after like 7 bites Lauren said something about Strawberry ice cream and I got sick and couldnt eat anymore..so amber smashed it on the table hehe. We played mini golf for like an hour. That was so fun wow. Caitlin rolled up her pant legs and went for a walk in the fake pond thing, I straddled a cannon and eileen straddled me, amber pissed on the fake ship, lauren is a bitch and got a really good score on all the holes, Eileen and Cait and I stood in this really old boat thing for a picture and cait broke off one side standing on it, and I broke off the other side..then I saw this palm tree thing that was fake...and Caitlin decided that she wanted to put a hole in it, so she stood there and beat this tree with her golf club for like 5 minutes haha. We went over to the Lazer tag. We played and that was SO MUCH FUCKING FUN omg..wow that was the best part of the night! Then we went and did go karts..Im a wimp so I didnt drive my own car..but then Lauren (my driver) told me that she hadnt driven a real car for a while, so she freaked me out..we got lapped by everyone like 7 times haha. I went in and played more games, and this guy that was at the go karts was following me around...we turned in all my tickets for jolly ranchers..and WHOA I just realized what Jolly ranchers can mean...omg JOLLY RANCHER...literally is a rancher who is happy...wow thats awesome! OK anyways then I came home and Brent called me the second I was walking through my door..so I told him to call back. He scares me a lot..he told me that I was SMOKIN hot when he met me...hmm ...well nothing to say about that. at all. Then he said we are casually dating..nothing to say about that either. Then he said he is my casual boyfriend and I said no. to that I say...no boyfriend. NO NO NO boys are for fun not relationships right now. Today I went to my soccer game. I ended up scoring on us.. that was fucked up. We tied. and then I went to Eileens. We took pics and hung out at stuff..and then went to the woods and bush wacked lol that was interesting. We went to Jasons house and hung out, and I fucked up a roll of film. That was not good at all...then Lauren told me that I used to be the funniest person that she knew and now Im stupid. I want to know what made me become stupid because I noticed it too. Im literally becoming stupider..like my brain isnt advancing with the rest of my age groups brains..now Im home, and Im bored..and I just want to go work out or something..damn.. I should do some situps. Ok well..yeah Im leaving now. Oh yeah...Greg and I are bitching at eachother. That no fun.


LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: it didnt use to be hard for you to talk to me
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: or have a good convo..at least I dont think
deuuuuuce: well see like the having a good convo part...
deuuuuuce: it's like it's usually one of us saying "hi" the other saying "hi" and then "what's up" "oh not too much, u?" "same"
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: yeah and then..dead
deuuuuuce: ......and then.....thats it
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: thats what I mean...its a gay convo
deuuuuuce: yeah i know...
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: almost not worth having except for that its our only form of communication
deuuuuuce: well hmm
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: guess this is just where the whole..different parts of our lives thing comes in huh'
deuuuuuce: to me it seems like we talked so much lately that we get to the point sometimes that there's nothing to really talk about...
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: oh
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: ok

hmm...so Greg and I arent going to be talking much at all anymore. Thats fucked up

am I still a sexy mamajama? who knows
am I being stalked by a freak? I think so
do I like 'him' now that I think he doesnt like me? ...maybe...
Hillary

my mom ended up taking away my cell phone thursday night. Oh well, I just need to get another permit and I can get it back. Last night was hella gay. After school I went to Owens house with Lex. He is really awesome. We 'hung out' :D it was fun. I stood on a roof for the first time in my life, it was scary. And then I climbed through a window and fell off the window sill. haha. Owen took us to my house at around 5 30 or something..my mom came home and bitched like usual. I went to work out with Eileen and Cait at like 7 30. Dan told me that my mom thinks Im on drugs, so while I was walking home from Curves, she left and went looking for me even though she knew I was at Curves. Stupid ass woman. I went to bed at 10 30 and slept until 10 30 this morning. it was so great. I went and worked out with the girls, (minus Lauren) and now Im getting in my swimsuit and going to swim laps with Rhys and Eileen for an hour and a half. :) yay. Tonight is Laurens bday party, I better get to go! It will be so much fun!!!! Gota go, Rhys and Eileen are here!
oh yeah, and Im not hanging out with Brent today :D
Hillary

Im so stressed. Too many men. I didnt think I would ever in my life say that. I have a stalker, I want an untouchable...well....4 of them actually..Im in an odd situation because there is another untouchable that I want, but I FOR SURE cant get him, but he sends me wierd signals and tells me he would like to ...be bad. haha but..he has a girlfriend. Ive lost 11 pounds and 3 percent body fat since I joined curves!
OK, I just cant stand my stalker boy AT ALL. Yesterday he called me 8 times between 2 45 PM and 10 PM. He called me after school and I told him I couldnt talk until 6 30, so he just got online and IMed me this...god damn it...people if you ever want to turn me OFF of you, try to control me. Its never going to work and it will just make me mad...anyways
Twocmer5: hey
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: hey
Twocmer5: i was gonna call but i didnt think youd be home you said you were getting home at 6 30
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: yeah I got home a bit ago cuz we went to work out earlier than we planned
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: but yeah my cell is dead right now and my mom and her boyfriend are on their way home..my moms boyfriend just had surgery
Twocmer5: oh thanks for calling and letting me know
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: I dont call guys
Twocmer5: not even to let them know your home
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: I didnt know you needed to talk to me the second I got in
Twocmer5: well i wanted tot talk to you thats all
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: sorry
Twocmer5: its ok but im going to get my hair cut and so ill talk to you later tonight ok
Twocmer5: will your cell be chargerd later
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: alright
Twocmer5: will your vell be charged later
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: yeah it should be done by like 7 30
Twocmer5: ok later sweety
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: bye
MAYBE people shouldnt think that they can control me. Its really really really pissing me off. WOW Ive been in a really bad mood the last three days. Im so fucking annoyed, someone keeps on calling my house, and my phone will only ring 2 times and then turn on the answering machine and so I dont have a chance to answer, and then whoever the god damned person is hangs up. I want to beat them over the head with this peice of shit phone. I bet its stalker boy. So maybe its a good thing. I am so sick of phones now. I just am going crazy. I want to murder so many people right now
it could be the lack of food..or the lack of sleep...or my shit loads of homework...or my amazing stress level....or that I have a stalker on my hands that is a horny fuck and wont leave me alone...or..........i duno
Today Lex and Mark and this other guy and I left campus for lunch. the guys are allowed off but we arent supposed to leave. We went to wendys and lex and I shared fries and chicken nuggets and a diet coke yum. We almost got caught coming back into the school because terri (the lady who checks the cars for sophmores) was watching lex and I getting out of the car, and the principal was walking right towards us...Lex and I ran into the gym and got away :) we are skilled.
Tomarrow night Im going to Jasons house with Eileen. Saturday Im supposed to meet my stalker..maybe when he sees me I can change his mind :D and then Saturday night is Laurens bday..Sunday I have a soccer game, and Stevens birthday party. That night I think Im spending the night at Lexis with her and Danielle, and then Monday Im supposed to go to a movie with stalker boy. Tuesday thru friday is finals week ! IM SO STRESSED! I am going to have a nervous breakdown, I need some time to sleep....or party :)
tomarrow Im going to hang out with Lex and this guy named Owen, it should be fun :) I have to go make dinner for Dan and us cuz Dan just had surgery.
Hillary

Today is a majorly shitty day for me. Thats just because of my attitude though. Its like one of those days that everything is so boring and unexciting and ....icky. I think its like a wierd form of PMS..cuz sometimes I just get completely bitchy..like now. Everything, EVERYTHING bothers me. My own best friend. jeese its like fucking shit she is on the phone whining about beck. and telling me about jason. I dont care. at all. guysguysguys.I DONT CARE!!!!!! AH I cant even explain the situation, so here is Lexis and my convo today..

me: but what happened to having dinner with beck?
PLayGurl: well... he was with jason
PLayGurl: so i said fuck that
me: I knoq
PLayGurl: bastard will fuck that up 4 me
PLayGurl: 2 bd..
PLayGurl: bad*
me: no he didntk now what was going on
me: Beck didnt know you wanted to come over
PLayGurl: ya.. i know
PLayGurl: michaela did that
me: sorry
PLayGurl: he wasnt sposed 2
PLayGurl: did u tel him
PLayGurl: shit
me: Ill show you
PLayGurl: k
me: Consumer No425: hello
Consumer No425: im leaving soon
me: oh
Consumer No425: beck is here
me: ok
me: oh tell him hi and sorry for what I do when Im drunk
me: are u going to have dinner at his house?
Consumer No425: lol sure thing
Consumer No425: lol why
Consumer No425: no we are going to hang out
me: I thought he was having a dinner at his house with michaela and lexi tonight?
Consumer No425: he doesnt know what the fuck your talking about
me: oh
me: :(
me: ok ttyl
Consumer No425: lol
Consumer No425: alright you take care
Consumer No425: byebye
me: same
PLayGurl: shit
me: what
PLayGurl: shit shit
me: what?
me: was it a secret?
PLayGurl: he dudnt kknow
PLayGurl: yes
me: how were you planning on having dinner there without him knowing?
PLayGurl: please do me a favor and dont say anythign to jasona bout me and beck
PLayGurl: dont even bring me up with him
me: I didnt thats all I said ever
me: ok
PLayGurl: he was sposed to with michaela
PLayGurl: adn i was just gona come
me: oh
PLayGurl: and we calle dhima dn thats y he said no...
PLayGurl: fuck
PLayGurl: makes sense
me: when did you call him
PLayGurl: 7
PLayGurl: when did u talk2 him
me: uhh like probably right before then
PLayGurl: lollol
me: but thats the only thing I said and I dont see why he would say no
PLayGurl: so u talked 2 brent
me: sorry though
PLayGurl: 2 much 2 type
me: yeah
me: he called me today when I was at lexis house
me: I mean Eileens
PLayGurl: o no dont trip
PLayGurl: thats awesome
PLayGurl: how was the convo??
me: not long, I just told him what I was doing and that I was busy so I couldnt really talk
me: so I think he is calling me later tonight
PLayGurl: nice
PLayGurl: pimp
***
PLayGurl: i worked so hard and i thought i finnally had a chacne and hten jaosn blins sides me
PLayGurl: he will do his best to fuck it up bc he think i ruined any chance he had with u
me: I duno Im just sick of this entire fucking situation
PLayGurl: o believe me i know
PLayGurl: its a shit deal
PLayGurl: ims orry for saying things about him
PLayGurl: i shoulda been more considerate of ur feelings but its true hes a jerk...
me: yeah
me: well dont worry
PLayGurl: and i just want 2 protect ya ,,u know
me: yeah
PLayGurl: from things like this ... lol
me: sorry if I fucked over you and beck
PLayGurl: no
PLayGurl: its not u
PLayGurl: jasonw ill handle that lol
me: yeah but it all comes back to me
me: like you and jason were good friends
PLayGurl: i will have 2 repair that if its evenworht my time
PLayGurl: beck not jason
me: then we went and hung out with him and you know what happened
PLayGurl: ya
PLayGurl: well
PLayGurl: its ok
PLayGurl: he obvious isnt a true friend
me: and then you guys started like shit talking eachother to me and I was trying to stand up for the both of you
PLayGurl: u just proved that
PLayGurl: lol
PLayGurl: ya
PLayGurl: well
me: and then you guys had some fucked up wierd fight thing
PLayGurl: ya i didnt even do anyting
PLayGurl: thats what gets me
me: and Im like HELLO what are you doing I will just stop talking to jason if its that big of a deal
PLayGurl: is i was trying ot be nice
me: and now you guys arent friends
PLayGurl: ya
PLayGurl: well w/e
me: and Im like still stuck in the middle and its like you are both watching me to see if Im favoring the other one
PLayGurl: hes ignorant
PLayGurl: adn arrogant
PLayGurl: and what not
PLayGurl: not worth either of our time

well Ill write more later im on the phone with Brent

Hillary

hmm I thought I hadnt posted for a while. I guess just becasue so much has happened lately and I just forgot. So .....yeah Jason got mad at me cuz I wanted Eileen to come. we ended up not going and I went to amandas house and hung out with her and rita all day and then came home and I dont remember what I did after that. Oh yeah I slept cuz I had a soccer game yesterday. I got up at 9 45 on sunday morning and went to my soccer game. It was the best game I have ever played at indoor! I came home and did nothing for the whole day..actually....shit..I hate my memory. OH YEAH I went to Eileens house and we worked on our photo books and made fun of her brother for the whole night. I came home and slept didnt do homework. Today I got up and went to school..I got my PSAT scores back and I got a 1040 :( but I got 98% better than all the other sophmores in the nation on the writing section! yay. 76% better on math and 68% better in verbal.(whatever that is) After school I went home with Eileen and we worked on our photo journals. I fucked up my page but it was all good anyways it just looks like something I would create...nothing too crazy..I just cant draw.lol. We went to curves and worked out at 5 15 and then I came home at 6 15. OH YEAH I GOT A CELL PHONE LAST NIGHT!!! YAY Im so happy about that! Anyways, I came home and Brent started talking to me online, apparently Id missed his call yesterday..so he called me..three times tonight and we talked for a bit. I guess we are going to see a movie on Saturday..and he wants to do...wait...we are just gona hang out saturday and then on monday go see a movie...shit I dont know..Tomarrow my mom is coming to school and presenting something about ultrasound. wow..embarrassing. ah well it will be fun. I got a bunch of new hair things yay. well Im hellllla tired..so Im off to sleeptownUSA..is that a mattress store? I swear Ive heard of it before...anyways me and my random, forgetful self are leaving now night

Thursday, was an all around gay day if I remember correctly..hmm I got up and went to school..wait...I dont think I had school thursday..yeah, there was no school thursday..wait, yes there was....damnit. I dont remember thursday at all. All I remember about thursday is that my mom get me odwalla juice and I went shopping and got 3 new shirts and 2 pairs of pants. WAIT>>>Im remembering...OH YEAH Lexi came over after school and we went to the stores across the street to get her film developed. We were laughing so hard at stuff that probably wasnt even funny. I went and worked out after that and then my mom and I went shopping. I talked to Jason on the phone until 11 or something and then went to bed around 12 40. Friday was a half day yay. So at school, I had a math quiz and stupidness in there, and then at the 15 min break Michaela showed me her alcohol and I was like DAMMMMN gimmmmeeee some! so we were planning on drinkin it after school, but...Lexi had to babysit, I was going to Jasons (that would not have been a very good plan lol) so yeah...we never got to drink it. :( David Brewer drove lex and I home after school (to lexis) and we hung out there for a bit. I went to Jasons at 12 and hung out there till 4 20 just chillen and watching an extremely goofy movie and stuff. I came home and did chores and at like 6 Jason brought me a book that I am using for my photo journal and then I went to Eileens to work on our photo books. We had taco del mar for dinner and worked on our books until like 2 in the morning. hehe it was sooo fun wow. we got up and went to work out..and I think Im fighting with Jason now. But I dont have time for it so Im going to amandas :)
Hillary

Another SNOWDAY! Yay! Today was not as fun as yesterday lol by social means. But for me, it was great. I got up at 6 and went into the living room to see if we had another snow day. Nope...we werent on the news. So I came in and started packing my backpack..and then I went out and checked again. wishful thinking..we still werent listed as no school. So in a desperate pleading for a snowday, I got online and checked the LWSD website. NO SCHOOL! yay! I talked to Jason for a second and we both were like uhhh back to bed..so we went back to sleep. Then someone called me at 10 30 to see if I wanted to hang out..they woke me up. I went to curves at 12 with cait and eileen and eileens mom. Eileen gets to go on the cruise!!! She found out this morning I think..IM SO EXCITED FOR SPRING BREAK HOLY SHIT! we are going to have so much fun yay! At curves, they had put my name up on the BIG LOSERS BOARD for losing the 6 pounds and however many inches..and they are ordering Eileen and I TeeShirts for promoting them so well lol. We have gotten so many people to join! I got home from workin out at like 1 ish..and just hung out at home all day. Jason called me and we talked on the phone for a while..I dont know how long maybe an hour. We were talking about this window art thing I got, and I asked if he wanted me to make him something and he said yes, so I made him a mermaid picture ITS SO COOL! Lex called me and we made plans...kinda....for Friday..Im going to go home from school with her and then at 12 she is gona drop me off at Jasons house. I think Friday night im going to a concert that my friend Victor is playing in with Jessie..and Saturday Im hanging out with bad mamajama (Jason) again for some jack:D. Right now I want to do some sit ups...and take a shower...and all that fun stuff...so Im out. Oh yeah, Kevin had Herrick IM me today to ask when I was going to pick up my stuff from Kevins house...and then when we figured it all out...Kevin IMed me and asked me when I was gona come pick my stuff up from his house. dumb ass lol..but yeah he is dropping it off tomarrow. YAY I get my clothes back! and I dont even have to talk to him, cuz I told him to leave them at my door hehe
~Sexy Mamajama~
Tomarrow and Friday are going to be great days for school, we have only 4 classes tomarrow cuz of the half day on Friday whooo hoo

Today was so awesome! I met up with Jason at Kamiakin, and we walked to his house in the blizzardish snow. We got there and went down to his room/community and he brought in the DVD player so we could watch a movie. He put in this movie called fear and loathing in las vegas. We watched that and it was really confusing, cuz its about all these wierd drugs and we were shuffling about on his 'bed' trying to get comfortable a lot. Rhys and Eileen showed up out of nowhere..lol and wanted me to come play in the snow..but I told them to come back in half an hour so we could finish the movie. They said OK and left and the movie ended really quickly after that, so I layed down and Jason got his guitar and was playin stuff for a while, I almost fell asleep.. it was really cool/comfortbale. Then we were talkin for a while and like an hour after Rhys and Eileen left, they came back and we all hung out in Jasons room for a bit. We left cuz I was gona go to Eileens, and Jason was going to Travis' house so we all walked together up to around Kelseys house, and Jason gave me a hug and we were off to Eileens. We went into Eileens room and talked..then went and watched some cartoons for a while. We went downstairs and Eileen did a skateboarding game and Rhys and I watched. Rhys' mom came and picked us up at 5 to go to my house...and my mom was RIGHT in front of us the whole way home. it was such shit cuz I hadnt done my chores yet..so Eileen and I jumped out of the car and ran home since running was faster than driving considering the snow..and I ran in and was unloading the dishwasher when she walked in...that was bad..she yelled about that and gave Eileen the cruise info...and then Eileen left and now Im just chillen talkin to people. Im out

**Sexy Mamajama** :)

oh yeah
...I remembered tonight why I dont want a boyfriend anytime soon...
I fucking hate being confused.
dont waste your time on being jealous, because the person you are jealous of has no way of knowing you are and it would only make them feel better about themselves if they did know. So just live and let live...love and let love...

ITS A SNOWDAY!! YAY!! I am sooo happy omg! Well Ill write more about my great snow day later, right now I gota go cuz Jason is gona come meet me like halfway to my house or something and then we are going to his house to watch a movie. ITS SNOWING HARD! yay
Im gona have a GREAT day!
Chocolate Thunda!

Today we had school. What shit. I was so not ready to go back and so many people were doing stupid shit because they werent either. First stupid thing of the day..I woke up at 6 50 cuz I went to bed at 1 something after talking to Jason and couldnt sleep till 245AM...Then I woke up at 5 because my cat was throwing up and I had to get her off my bed..then I couldnt sleep and when I finally got back to sleep...I was too tired to get up at 6. I left for the bus stop, and this guy that looked kinda familiar walked up to me and was like "uhhhhh is this where the bus to the highschool goes?" and I was like "yeah." and that was the end of the convo...so I just turned my CD player on and waited..I got to school and went into the cafeteria with everyone, and the young twins came in hehehe I looked at Liz's shoes..and she had one white basketball shoe on..and one black kinda dressy shoe on. I was like what the fuck. and she laughed cuz she was not 'paying attention' when she put her shoes on this morning haha..thats the first example of people not being ready for school to start back up...then I did like 3 things that prove I wasnt ready....hmm I forgot my spanish book...and in math I

ITS THE LAST DAY OF BREAK :'( That is so uncool. Yesterday after I wrote, I started getting ready and stuff..and at like 5 30 I went to Lexis. Her and Jason were downstairs..and Nick had 2 little boy friends over that were being annoying. We sat downstairs and talked and Jason played a skateboarding game on Xbox and we listened to music. At like 6 30 Celeste and Alex left for a club or something and the little boys left sept Nick. We went upstairs (we were told not to do that...will be important to remember that later..) and hung out for a while..we did a lot of sitting and stuff lol and then David Brewer came over and was kickin it with us. At 8ish Brandon came over and we were all just chillen in the kitchen. Me and Jason were fuckin around with his phone and he took a pic of me with it and made it his phones wallpaper. I think that camera phones are hella cool lol I was takin pics a lot. Brandon left and then David Lex Jason and I went into the living room and were hangin out till 11 when lexis parents came home. WE GOT SCREAMED AT because davids car was blocking the driveway...and there was a HOUSE FULL OF KIDS....it waas wierd. So anyways they kicked the guys out, and yeah...I think I shouldnt go into much detail but it was scary. I went into lexis room and got online and Jason said something about her parents being mad, and Lexis mom walked in so I tried to close the box fast lol...My mom called and I got yelled at by Alex because the phone at Lexis house apparently never stops ringing. My mom sent dan to pick me up at like 11 45..and then I came home and chatted with peeps for a while. I went to bed at 1 30ish and slept until 1 this afternoon. that was crazyness..I got online and Jason and I were chattin about last night and stuff..haha...and about the ice skating show I was going to tonight. He said we should go ice skating together..thats gona be fun! and then at 3 I left for the Stars On Ice show. It was soo cool. Man I want to go skating so bad now I love it and miss it so much!! (*I used to skate like 4 times a week..till they asked me to do competitions and I got stage frieght and quit) I just got home and am talking to Jason and Rhys. WE HAVE AN INDOOR SOCCER GAME TOMARROW YAY!!!!! School is tomarrow...boo
I hate school. Well yeah Im gona go Jasons gona call and I need to eat cuz I havent yet today and its dinner time. damn school...awesome parties!!!
*HILLARY*

alright im a drunkard...got pretty wasted last night. I SAW SARAH! I missed her so much and she showed up at Jasons house. It was me, lex, sarah, amy, jason, beck, colen, kyle finch, this other guy that i dont know, and prolly some other people. dude.....fucking fun ass time. yesterdyay: I got up at like 8 and went with my mom to get her emissions test and then to get my passport. My mom brought me home and to mcdonalds for breakfast (I got a yogurt parfait!) Lauren and Eileen and I went to the curves in houghton to work out..and then we saw jess. She passed her written lol. I came home and went to pick up the hair color I wanted so lexis mom could dye my hair. Celeste picked me up at 2 45 and we went to lexis (celeste is her mom). We started my hair at like 3 (I had it straightened so she could actally do shit with it) and it took until like 4 15 I was so surprised at how fast it went. Then she cut like 3 inches off the bottom to get rid of my nasty dead ends. We were talking a lot about random things...from moaning old ladies to smoking weed lol. I LOVE Lexis mom! Her and I have so much in common. Anyways then I hung out in Lexis room until 6 when my mom picked me up. Lex wasnt there cuz she had gone to a movie with Jason. I got home, and Lex IMed me, she got home like a minute after I left..and she said something about going to Jasons and asked if she could spend the night. So she came over, we made plans with the guys, and went to Jasons house at 9:30ish. We walked in, and I almost fell over when I walked in his bedroom. It smelled like pot,tabacco,insence, and guy lol. I sat down next to this guy on one of the mattresses that is on his floor. It was just lex me jason collen and matt at that time. We watched this video of some guys from school putting on a bra and chasing people...interesting. jason had a bottle of jack daniels. that is the shit that always gets me in trouble. I swear. Lex took a little and mixed it with some root beer. yuck that was so fucking sick. I just poured about 2 shots in a cup and drank it. Then I did it again. Then I did it again...Jason started talkin to me and stuff, he said I had taken like 8 shots right then..Lex and I went to the bathroom a lot together to pee and we found porn in there, it was funny. I showed Jason and he was like DUDE MY MOM PUT THAT IN THERE! hehe. Jason was carrying me somewhere somehow and he scratched my finger like barely at all..but I made a huge deal about it and how I needed a band-aid lol. So he was like "oh they are in here" and took me into the bathroom or something...and then he started to pee and i was just standing there next to him. I was pretty drunk by then and uhhh...ended up seeing his member..lol because he was saying he couldnt pee so I was like wellll do you have a boner? (fucking stupid ass things I say when Im messed up) and he was like uhhhh no...so then I was wondering why he couldnt pee and I guess I looked. Then we both were like uhhh why are/am you/I in here with me/you. HAHA that was so confusing to type and try to read. ahh anyways...then he gave me a bandaid...then we just did stupid shit for the rest of the night. at midnight I was supposed to go home but at 11 50 Jason said I should call and say we are watching the lord of the rings 2 towers and that id need to stay till 1 ish..so I called but I couldnt really talk...and I ended up telling my mom that I wanted to stay till 1 because we were watching the king of the towers. wow. She said no and so someone told me to go take a shower and ill be sobered up. Someone else said to go outside and so I did...but all I had on was a little black tank top (and jeans). IT WAS SO FUCKING COLD! It was snowing shit. Jason was out there with me and he was hugging me and stuff and...yeah..............then he asked for my number but I wouldnt tell him it...and he had playdoh on his kitchen table soo.....I started rolling out stuff and I made my name and number out of playdoh haha. Then I met his grandma...and she totally knew I was drunk. She said something about if people opened the door ONE MORE TIME she was gona slap them, and I was like OH SHIT your gona slap me in a second then cuz I am about to go home. And she started laughing and was like well its ok cuz you will already be gone so I cant do anything about it right? Shes awesome. I went downstairs and fell onto Beck..I duno what my problem is...I fall on him everytime Im around him..this time I was straddeling him. GOD embarrassing. But I stayed dressed the whole night! at 12 15 a bunch of people brought me and lex home. we were so fucked up still. I went and said hi to my mom and stuff..and then lexi went to get some water and when she came back in my room she dropped the water on the floor. SO LOUD holy crap. Then she got out the vibrator that G-regulator got me for christmas haha...iteresting times with that. I talked to greg and said some wierd things...and then I went to bed at like 2. I woke up this morning at 9 and was really hot, so I went and opened the window and turned off the heat....and my shirt was really damp. So I thought I had just drooled a lot..but it was my WHOLE shirt so I was really confused. I went back to bed anyways. When Lex and I got up at 11 ish I was telling her about it, and she was like SHIT HILLARY you forgot everything you did didnt you? and I was like uhhhh what? Apparently she was trying to be a good friend and not let me get a hangover, so she brought me a cup of water while I was sleeping...and I woke up and started drinking it and then she layed down for bed....and then I said "OH MY GOD THIS IS COLD HEHEHEHEHE"......I accidentally spilled it all over myself. wow. what a dumb ass. I had fucked up dreams too. but yeah. Lex and I went to subway for breakfast at 12 30 and I had this atkins wrap thing. It was so good! and I had a chocolate milk mmm mm gooodness. Ameer was there but we didnt really talk..we came home and took lex to her house at 2. I think that tonight we are going to stay at her house, and have Jason and Daniel and beck and some other guys over...I duno tho. NO MORE DRINKING FOR ME! Last night...wow...I wont say what I did..but..hmm I did it in front of so many people for like half an hour....wow....alrighty then. I need to learn. but I never will.anyways
I am going to clean and get showered up and stuff so that I can go to lexis and have some fun!
HAPPY 2004!!!
ChocolateThunda/Lily/JasonsBitch lol/Heartbreaker (thanks russell lol)/Beautiful (ahhh so sweet jason)
or just plain old....
Hillary

OMG Lexi you are so great I LOVE YOU!!!!
My profile:
Question of the day:

How many people saw me topless last night?

Lexi IMs me:
PLayGurl2282: Answer: everyone at my house
LEctRIcbuLLRIdER: haha
PLayGurl2282: haha

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!
Its 2004! YAY!
Yesterday was FUCKING AWESOME holy shit. I got up at 8 and went to work out with the girls, we did our thang and then I came home at 9 30 or something. My sis finally came to get me at 11 40 (she was supposed to come at 10) and we went to the post office. We actually found it :D yay! We walked in and waited in a line for a few minutes and then realized we werent supposed to be where we were so we had to leave that line and go down this hall into another line that was only 4 people long. All the sudden like 20 people walked in and got in line behind us and we were like DAMN talk about beating the crowd! There were these two people 2 spots in front of us, one was old and senile and one was a wierd ass woman with a ten foot long hanging hat..dont know how to explain it..anyways they got up to the counter and tried to use printer paper pictures for their passport pics. hahaha I think you had to be there but they were trying all these stupid things to cheat on the passport thing. THEN :'( I felt so bad for this guy, he was right in front of us, and we had all been waiting like 40 minutes, and he walked up with this huge form filled out and all he wanted to do was renew his passport, the lady looked at the paper and told him it had to be the brown form, told him to go to the counter and get it and fill it out and go to the end of the (now 20 person long) line. IT WAS SO SAD. he was a cute old man too. Then we went and sat down all scared cuz this lady had been a bitch to everyone else...she looked at me and asked for my liscence and I was like uhhh I dont have one and shes like "you cant get your passport your mom or dad has to be here with you" and that was that for me. Then she took Shalias picture (15 dollars!) and stapled it to the forms and did all this other shit..and anyways I have to go back and get my passport shit done AGAIN tomarrow FOR THE 3RD TIME. Shalia and I left the post office and she dropped me off at home. ( we listened to pimp juice on the way OMG i love that song!) I went in and did some quick chores then Lex came to pick me up and we went to her house I think...no wait.we went to safeway AND THEN we went to her house. I started straightening my hair at 2 and Lex and I were pickin out our underwears and shit for the night ;) hehe. At 4 30 I had finished my hair and I started pickin out my outfit. HOLY shit Lexi and I looked sooo cute last night. I dont ever say that about myself but we looked HOT. lol. Lexi had on this tank top with lace on the boobs (her ENORMOUS ones) and these jeans that we got when we went shopping the other day. *and the bright pink booty shorts I got her for Xmas*. I had on a pair of my new jeans with a black and nude lace bra thats soo cute and one of my new thongs. I had a black undershirt/tanktop thing with a white long sleeved shirt that says something in black velvet on the front..its a boat neck so my shoulders were showing (*and the black bra straps*) the shirt has a white long tie thing off the bottom of one of the sides. PLUS MY HAIR WAS STRAIGHT. which is always a plus. lol. Patty and Brian came over and were talkin to us for a bit but it was too cold so we went back inside and they left. Steven came over and told us we looked like hoes trying to get laid but that we looked pretty too so oh well. Then we kicked steven out and took 2 shots of coconut rum each and like three shots of bacardi each (oh sick I had all three shots in my mouth at once cuz Lex made me drink the whole cup of it at once lol) Then Beck Nick and Danny showed up. We all went downstairs and were chillen talking and stuff and Danny started talking about how he was gona get his dick sucked. me and lex were a little outa it so Lexi thought it was a good idea to ask about his dick or something, so she was poking around it trying to find it...and she did..lol..then we were talking about circumsizion and stuff..It started gettin kinda nasty right about then. Lex poked Nicks dick and was like damn thats big blahblah...and beck left to go get the beers and these 2 girls that I didnt know named nicole and lauren. They were gone for a long time so it was just me and danny on one couch and lex and nick on the other talking. we went upstairs and got in this huge wrestling match over lexis diary thing that we wrote those pages about all the guys she likes. so I broke the diary trying to tear out the three pages and Lex and I ended up locking ourselves in the bathroom and flushing them down the toilet. haha. we went back downstairs and a mini bottle of jack daniels fell out of Danny's pocket and I was like OH SHIT and grabbed it. He was like NOOOOO give it back. (they had been trying to get me and lexi to make out and bang eachother and all this shit all night but we hadnt...) So they said we could have the bottle if we flashed them. SO lol....I couldnt get my shirt up to flash them so lexi had to reach around me and unhook my bra. Danny was like "damn Hillary I like your body, damn hillary you have a really nice body" he said that a lot..then we flashed them and they were like WAIT WE DIDNT SEE (nick looked at lexis and danny looked at mine lol) so we did it again and they tried to say that they didnt see again but we didnt do it again..Danny started talking then that he really liked my body and shit and my boobs are nice and stuff..so me and lex ran upstairs and she peed while I opened the jack daniels. I was like OK ill drink half the bottle and u get half, so I took a swig, and when I put it down...I had drank like 3/4 of it..so I tried to spit some back in the bottle haha but I missed and spit a little on her floor..then I drank the rest..I felt bad but yeah. Then we went back downstairs and Danny was like "SOO how bout some head?" and I was like uhhhh what? I dont think so..and yeah we had a long time of perverted drunken talk..Beck and the gurls showed up with an 18 pack I think and 3 40s of OEHG oh my god. I took a beer and drank it in like 1 minute (bottle bud lite yumm!) and then I asked if I can have another and Beck said only one more..so i drank that in like one minute...and I moved on to the 40s. I asked the girls if I could have a little bit and Nicole let me have 2 drinks. I wanted more...so she said that she wanted to see if the guys were right about my boobs so I had to show her one for more drink. So she pulled out my shirt and looked at my nipple haha and was like OHHH NICE!!!! then I drank..I wanted more so she said I had to flash her....(not realizing like 15 guys were sitting on the couches) I said ok and flashed her and Cody was like I JUST SAW SOME BOOBIES! annd I drank more. Then I crawled over to beck. Lex likes him and I was like YOU BETTER NOT POP HER HYMEN. (omg Im such a loser) and I fell over on his lap and bit his leg. I dont know why. I crawled up the stairs and sat down next to cody who was playing video games. then I fell forward and onto him....uhh and somewhere along the way when i was downstairs I showed beck and danny that I can put my feet behind my head..lol they thought that was great. Then I went into Lexis room and talked online for a while...I dont know what I said but I was rambling to greg and we got in a wierd argument thing about nothing at all....and then I left the room...I went downstairs and took becks beer from him and drank it and he was like WTF! then i handed him the empty bottle and started talking to the girls. Nicole was telling me that Im beautiful and stuff and i have a nice ass..and she spanked me .....hmm..then I remember she was on one side of lexi and I was on the other and I had one hand on her butt cheek and one on her boob..and so did Nicole..Nick and Lauren dissappeared and when I went up to go online for a minute everyone was like NO!!!!!! they are in there...so i walked in (stupid me again) and nick and her were on Lexis bed...i was like WHOA DUDE SORRY and nick jumped down and was like 'its ok!' and left..lauren zipped up her pants and we had a wierd conversatioon on the floor about something but I dont remember what...and then I went to the living room. I sat down next to nick and was like what the hell was that and hes like "i have no idea, she was on me and making these noises but we were dressed so she was faking and then she kept saying she wanted to fuck me.." and i was like ohhh ok..thats wierd we just met these girls lol. So then I asked why she was zipping her pants and nick said he didnt know cuz he hadnt taken them off of her or anything. lol. I went downstairs and got annoyed by my shirt or something and took it off....and was walking around without my shirt...then put it back on and took it back off like 10 times Lexi told me today. people went outside to get high and I past out on the floor of lexis downstairs..lauren came down and sat next to beck and was like talking about how they liked eachother and im like WTF you were just doing shit with NICK! (just thought it..cuz i couldnt really talk) so I got up and ran outside to tell lexi what happened cuz she likes beck. I thought she was in the backyard, so I went out there and the trampoline totally distracted me and I was set on jumping on it..so I got on (it was soaking wet and it had snow on it) and Danny was like yeah lets jump on it, he started trying to make me fall over so i grabbed his sweatshirt and he was dragging me in circles then I fell over in the snow and got all wet. I went inside and took a 40 (stole) and drank some...then me and nicole started talking some more..and lexi went into her bathtub and was crying about beck. (oh yeah I told her about that situation sometime) She said she was doing a test to see if anyone liked her and to come check on her in half an hour...so I left the bathroom and went in online again for like 3 mins, and I walked out and past the bathroom and she was GONE...so i was like uhhh wtf...I went and sat next to cody again. then I went downstairs and I remember laying on the floor without my shirt on and falling on top of lexi, and lexi getting on top of me and pulling her shirt up, and Nicole getting on top of me and humping me....and then I went somewhere else..Me and nick and danny and cody were all chillin upstairs and then everyone was leaving (11 30 ish) and so we said bye and it was just me and lex for a bit. I went online and said some shit to greg that I have no idea what it was....and then I past out on my bed in lexis room. her lil brother woke me up to tell me that it was 4 minutes till new years so I stumbled into the living room and watched the space needle for 8 minutes, but it only felt like 2..Lexi kissed me at midnight lol. then all the sudden cody came back at like 12 15 and a whole new batch of guys showed up. It was just me and lexi (the only girls) robby jason daniel cody this guy with an afro and another guy and another guy I think..and we were just sittin downstairs talking. thats when cody started flirting with me. i went upstairs and into the bathroom and threw up..and then went into the living room and sat on the white leather swivel chair...I fell asleep and cody came and sat on top of me. I was like uhhh ok..and I fell asleep. then he got up and took me outside with him and was makin me smoke a cigarette with him..literally haha I said no but he held it up to my mouth..then he started tickling me and was like are you ticklish huhhhh and I said "uh..nope" and walked away haha. then I sat back in my chair and he sat back ontop of me...and yeah wierdness..the other guys left except for Cody, lex kicked him out at like 3 something and we watched this really bad porno till 4 and then we went in her room and talked about everything that happened. She told me that the girl that kept telling me Im so pretty and hot and shit is a lesbian or something so I was like uhhh WHOA...kinda freaky..and yeah lots of other stuff but this post is so long its crazy. LAST NIGHT WAS THE SHIT THOUGH! and now Im home and its a new year! (Lexis parents stayed in a hotel in Seattle so we had the house to ourselves, hence the drinking and guys and everything.)
HILLARY :D