Ill probably write in here again later tonight to talk about what I did today..lol fun times..but right now I just want to put in some funny ass lyrics. If you know any country songs, its funnier but even if you dont..its definately worth reading!

Breath:
I can smell the onions floating in the air
Must be something that u ate
I cant imagine how ur mouth must taste
Forgive me if I turn away
The slightest wiff just brings me to my knees
I almost pass out in ur arms
I need a gas mask every time u come near
and the halitosis starts
cuz I can smell ur breath
its choking me to death
the only one who doesnt know is u
heres some gum to chew, or baby theres no way ur kissing me
whatd u have for lunch
dont u ever brush
maybe a binaca blast or two is what Id suggest
cuz I can smell ur breath
bad breath
Its hard to be there when ur waking up
and that green cloud fills up the room
its worser than its ever been before and I know
and u know and everybody in a three mile radius knows
u should see a dentist soon
cuz I can smell your breath
its gaggin me to death
something must have died inside of u
what u outa do is chase a cert or two with listerine
even when ur gone the oder lingers on
Im buying u an oral-b and a jumbo tube of crest
cuz I can smell ur breath
cant u smell the funk thats floating in the air
it must be something that u ate..


Everybody is free to get sunburned:
Ladys and gentlemen with no class
get sunburned
if I could offer you one tip for the future
it would be get sunburnt
the long term effects have been proven by scientists
to cause premature aging swollen feet and melanoma
but what the hell
you gota die of something
youll have a healthy glow and you will look good for at least one summer anyways
the rest of this is philosophical nonsence that I will attempt to regurgitate at this time
enjoy the power and beauty of your babysitter
oh nevermind
you will not understand the power and beauty of your babysitter until you are too old to enjoy them, legally
take nude photos of yourself
trust me in 30 years thats the only way you will still be able to see your feet
you are every bit as fat as you imagine
worry about your future especailly if it doesnt look like your going to have one
it wont change the outcome
but it will create deep cavernous wrinkles along the forhead area
the real things that will ruin your life are the ones that would never cross your mind
but do cross 4 lanes of traffic and blindside your antique 79 green gremeline on monday morning rush hour
do something everyday that scares the living hell out of you-look in the mirror
dont be reckless with other people hearts
who knows, you may need theirs for a transplant some day
belch, just belch
dont waste your time on jeapordy
jerry springer is much more educational
remember the race is long and in the end your kness are shot, youre dehydrated and all you have to show for it is a paper number
remember compliments, there wont be many
dont forget insults, you may reuse them
keep your old love letters, especailly the dirty ones
who knows when you might need one for a good cheap thrill 0n a lonely saturday evening
feel guilty if you dont know what to do with your life
good golly miss molly you are almost fourty, get it together!
most of the people I know were in jail at the age of 22
heck some were in jail by the age of 13-they knew what they wanted to do
maybe you will marry
hopefully you wont
but if you do, one thing is for sure
you will be divorced and broken and homeless ecetra ecetra
maybe you will collapse in the reck room at the brittle hills old folks home while attempting the funky chicken in your depends
abuse your body
pierce and tattoo every imagineable orface you can
its the greatest instrument you will ever own
play the hell out of it
dance-preferably in a strip bar
you will make a heck of a living
dont read the directions
the guy who wrote them is probably illiterate and doesnt know as much as you do
read nudey magazines
dont look at the pictures, they may make you feel inadequate.
friends come and go
but some will stick around to bum off of you for the rest of your miserable minimum wage life
work hard to buy bread for the gaps in your teeth
cuz the older you get the more rotten they become
live in los vegas, wayne newton does
live in san fransisco but leave before it makes you hard
maybe you will have a trust fund
if you do, trust me youll have fun
maybe youll have a wealthy spouse
beleive me they will make you sign a prenup
dont mess too much with your privates
you wont go blind but by the time you are 40 theyll look 85
some people say money cant buy happiness
obviously theyre not shopping in the right places
like a downtown corner at 2 AM in the morning
and remember what you hid from your parents as kids
you will hide from your kids as parents
hey-but trust me about that sunburn


Hillary